Unsettled Life
Moving from place to place, never staying long enough to gather friends who would be there for me later in life, was an adventure at first. Later in life however, there came a notable absence of anything that looked like a permanent friend due to my not being anywhere long enough through my life. Both of my brothers settled down, but as I continued to have “itchy feet” from nomadic ways instilled in me since birth, I never thought anything further about moving to the next adventure. Now I am tired of life just as an adventure, but having never lived in one place all through my life, find it hard to stay in one place and to learn how to ground.
Most people have the opposite problem, staying in one place most of their lives, saving for the retirement years when they can travel. So we pass each other as we both try to go in the opposite direction. My money has been spent all through my life just moving and enjoying life as I have gone. Now without money, it is forcing me to stay put as I no longer have the means or the transportation in order to keep moving. However, I have learnt that no-one has me over a barrel, and even if I just had a backpack, I would not be stuck even if I got out on the road and simply hitch-hiked to where I was going. It would not matter to me whether I was in the middle of the city, or in a suburban street, as I could still hitch from wherever I was. Having been taught by my father since the age of 12 to hitch, I have never forgotten the things I learnt from doing huge amounts of hitching all through my life. Many a person travelling just wishes to have a person to talk with, and being a “talking stick” can engage anyone in a conversation just about on any subject.
Life is not for the reflecting for me, due to the sheer volume of material lived in one life, so I prefer to look ahead rather than behind in my life. And from looking ahead, I have learned what it is to plan my next step, either with a vision or dream. The huge changes that have occurred in my life, have left me without friends, but better able to understand myself in all types of situations. It is only through being respectful and giving unconditional love wherever I am now, that I keep the ball rolling without adding further to the pains of separation from those things that I have loved. Much has been left behind. Many a book, if not a wall of books have been given away in my life, along with truckloads of material possessions. Now nothing is valuable any more, as the meaning of life increasingly has become just “two magical suitcases” to see what can come out of them in each new chapter. If I don’t give things away, even with nothing, it still gets taken from me, so have learned to simply let it go, and move on. With such a life, there is always a person who gets let down so fast are the changes that come my way. There is no intended harm, but when I happen upon a person who immediately thinks they have me just where they want, control issues begin to appear, and I simply walk away from control freaks even with nothing.
So I have learned to hit the ground running wherever I have gone in my life. Now things as I am getting older are beginning to slow down considerably, as my spirit begins to tire, and my visions become just another jaded journey. Been there done that, is the sigh that my weary body gives increasingly with age. So full has been the life, with so many merry-go-rounds in life, that I sometimes wish just to get off, and go to the next level rather than ride one more time around the same old, same old. Life has now, a bittersweet quality about it, as things loved have long gone, and when trying to regain anything lost, or revisit an old place, everything has changed, and I find that there is no way to go back where I came from, even though sometimes the desire is there. So rather than pine, and cry over what is lost, I say hello to the new, and embrace anything offered to me along the way. The idealisms are long gone, as the hard but youthful bodies have mellowed and changed to more of an appreciation for the wisdom of an aged body over a new one.
Unsettled life, has given birth to a settled spirit longing for the next level, and patiently waiting for the change to occur when the time is ripe. For when the fruit is ripe, it drops………………….
Anaconda
Most people have the opposite problem, staying in one place most of their lives, saving for the retirement years when they can travel. So we pass each other as we both try to go in the opposite direction. My money has been spent all through my life just moving and enjoying life as I have gone. Now without money, it is forcing me to stay put as I no longer have the means or the transportation in order to keep moving. However, I have learnt that no-one has me over a barrel, and even if I just had a backpack, I would not be stuck even if I got out on the road and simply hitch-hiked to where I was going. It would not matter to me whether I was in the middle of the city, or in a suburban street, as I could still hitch from wherever I was. Having been taught by my father since the age of 12 to hitch, I have never forgotten the things I learnt from doing huge amounts of hitching all through my life. Many a person travelling just wishes to have a person to talk with, and being a “talking stick” can engage anyone in a conversation just about on any subject.
Life is not for the reflecting for me, due to the sheer volume of material lived in one life, so I prefer to look ahead rather than behind in my life. And from looking ahead, I have learned what it is to plan my next step, either with a vision or dream. The huge changes that have occurred in my life, have left me without friends, but better able to understand myself in all types of situations. It is only through being respectful and giving unconditional love wherever I am now, that I keep the ball rolling without adding further to the pains of separation from those things that I have loved. Much has been left behind. Many a book, if not a wall of books have been given away in my life, along with truckloads of material possessions. Now nothing is valuable any more, as the meaning of life increasingly has become just “two magical suitcases” to see what can come out of them in each new chapter. If I don’t give things away, even with nothing, it still gets taken from me, so have learned to simply let it go, and move on. With such a life, there is always a person who gets let down so fast are the changes that come my way. There is no intended harm, but when I happen upon a person who immediately thinks they have me just where they want, control issues begin to appear, and I simply walk away from control freaks even with nothing.
So I have learned to hit the ground running wherever I have gone in my life. Now things as I am getting older are beginning to slow down considerably, as my spirit begins to tire, and my visions become just another jaded journey. Been there done that, is the sigh that my weary body gives increasingly with age. So full has been the life, with so many merry-go-rounds in life, that I sometimes wish just to get off, and go to the next level rather than ride one more time around the same old, same old. Life has now, a bittersweet quality about it, as things loved have long gone, and when trying to regain anything lost, or revisit an old place, everything has changed, and I find that there is no way to go back where I came from, even though sometimes the desire is there. So rather than pine, and cry over what is lost, I say hello to the new, and embrace anything offered to me along the way. The idealisms are long gone, as the hard but youthful bodies have mellowed and changed to more of an appreciation for the wisdom of an aged body over a new one.
Unsettled life, has given birth to a settled spirit longing for the next level, and patiently waiting for the change to occur when the time is ripe. For when the fruit is ripe, it drops………………….
Anaconda
posted by ~Spiritwind~ at 12:36 PM
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